Day 8: I'm back again...

I’ve been feeling like death wrapped in a blanket these past few days. That’s my excuse... hehe.

And just to keep things light and cheerful, here are a few gems I’ve heard lately:

"You’re all on the same boat, but not everyone will reach the destination."

"How will you people even pass?"

"I really need to start being healthy, I can't trust these doctore"

Truly, nothing says supportive academic environment like being publicly questioned about your competence in front of your seniors, juniors and the patient.

Anyway—after such soul-lifting words and my body going through what can only be described as a medical mystery—I’m miraculously back. Up and about. Returning to my regularly scheduled chaos.

I was watching Resident Playbook the other day, and somewhere between the college and coffee breaks, it hit me—I’ve been shaping my future with every reel, every YouTube video, every overly romanticized K-drama scene.

Med school looks like a dreamy, aesthetic grind online. Everyone’s chasing passion, purpose, and pastel-colored notes.

And I get it. It looks beautiful.

But here’s what they don’t show:

The toxic culture. The constant self-doubt. The seniors who treat you like you snuck in through the back door. The hours that feel like eternity. The patients who think you owe them your soul and your kidneys.

Would I have chosen differently if I’d known?

No.

But would I have felt less sucker-punched if I’d been warned?

A thousand times yes.

Right now, even college feels like it’s actively trying to break me.

But somehow—through the burnout, the imposter syndrome, and the unsolicited motivational speeches—

I still choose this path.

I still love the science.

And when I imagine that tiny, powerful “Dr.” before my name after 5.5 years…

Yeah. That alone makes it worth it.